James B. Derwort, 73, of Marissa, IL, born April 15, 1948 in St. Louis, MO, passed away on Saturday July 3, 2021 at Cotton Point Living Center in Matthews, MO. Mr. Derwort was a school teacher.
He was preceded in death by his parents; Bernard and Jessie (Powell) Derwort, three brothers and 1 sister.
Jim is survived by his loving wife; Donna Sue (Bails) Derwort of Marissa, whom he married on August 16, 1969 in Charleston, IL, two children; Marcus James (Stephanie) Derwort of Freeburg, IL, daughter; Jackie (Talley) Haines of Mobile, AL, two brothers and four grandchildren; Alex and Lydia Derwort and Melaina and Maria Haines.
In lieu of flowers, memorials are encouraged to be made to Crown Hospice of Cape Girardeau, MO, St. Agatha Catholic Church in New Athens, IL, the Marissa Rec. Area or to the Alzheimer’s Association.
Visitation: Friends and family will be gathering from 4 to 7 p.m. on Thursday July 8, 2021 at Heil-Schuessler Funeral Home in Marissa, IL.
Private services are being scheduled.
Heil-Schuessler Funeral Home in Marissa, IL is in charge of arrangements.
My heart hurts at hearing of the death of Mr Derwort. He was the kindest, sweetest best teacher and person I’ve met. His family is the best as well. He is most definitely already safely in the arms of our Lord in Heaven. May all of your wonderful memories sustain you in your times of loss and need. My thoughts and prayers are with you all; Sue, Mark and Jackie. All my love, Pamela Sinn Hargan
ReplySue and family – Jim was a blessing! Such a fun guy and wonderful educator – he touched so many lives. Alzheimers is cruel – when my mom died all of us girls got tattoos, mine says “Your memories are kept in my heart.” May the memories of your loved one sustain you as you hold them in you heart.
Connie Calvert Cominsky
Condolences to the family! One of the great teachers that I had in high school. God bless the family
ReplyThe term “school teacher” hardly describes Mr Derwort’s occupation adequately as he was so much more to his decades of students whose lives he impacted. Math and sports were great passions as well as his passion for the Lord and his family. I am privileged to have been one of those students and considered him and Sue dear friends who I enjoyed visiting every time I came to town. Years ago, I was honored when they asked me to babysit their son Marc, a toddler at that time.
My prayers are uplifted with love for Sue, Marc, Jackie, their spouse and children.
ReplySo sorry to hear this! I worked with Jim at the high school for seven years. Sending prayers to all.
ReplyThoughts and prayers to the family. Mr. Derwort was one of the best teachers and just a kind and fun person to be around. He made school and math fun!
ReplyMr. Derwort, thank you for the great times of learning math and your support when the school board said no. To the times we shared talking about aircraft model kits. Your F-89 awaits you.
God Speed
ReplyIn am very sad to hear this ,what a great person he was and an outstanding teacher as well…My condolences and thoughts and prayers to his family..Godspeed Mr. D.. you will be missed by many,but never forgotten
ReplyMr. Derwart was such a wonderful person. I know he will be missed by many. Our prayers are going out to his family.
ReplySue, Marc, Jackie, and the rest of your family…I’m so sorry for your loss. He was the best teacher I have ever had and best colleague as well. Our school and our community were, and are, better places because of him. He was a great man, a selfless man, and I am honored to have known him. He is the main reason I got into teaching and will be forever grateful to him!!
ReplyRIP Mr Derwort. You made learning Math fun. Never had another teacher like you and wish my son had an educator that cared as much as you did. Condolences to the family.
ReplyI am so sorry to hear this news. My prayers and condolences go out to Sue, Jackie and Marc and their families. I’ll never forget when Mr Derwort had my trigonometry class over to his house one evening to tutor us on formulas. What an amazing teacher who touched the hearts of many. He was also a great athlete and never missed a run. Take comfort in knowing he is whole again and running a marathon in heaven. ❤️
ReplyRest in peace Jim.
ReplyMr Derwort, an Icon to Marissa school district. Such a Blessing to ALL that knew him. I have unmeasurable respect, love and admiration for him and his wonderful wife Sue. He is running with Jesus and telling jokes to all the Angels. ❤️😇✝️
My deepest condolences to Sue and his family!
Mr Derwort was an exceptional teacher and person. Thinking of the family.
Sincerely,
Connie Crouse Sommer
I was very sad to hear that Jim had passed. We were a math teaching team for 17 years. He was an awesome teacher and truly one of the nicest people that I have ever met. The whole family was so nice. My prayers and thoughts are with his family during this difficult time. I am remembering his smile and some of the pranks that we pulled off. He always was willing to give of his time to help others. What a wonderful legacy he has left! I am glad that I knew Jim and his family.
ReplyMr. Derwort touched so many lives. Truly a wonderful person and the best teacher I’ve ever had. So sorry to all of his family.
ReplySo sorry to hear of his passing. He was an exceptional person and teacher. He was one of my favorite teachers at Marissa. He gave more of his time than most to his students and we appreciated it. Always looked for to seeing the color combination of his outfits since he said he was color blind. RIP Mr. Derwort you were one of a kind and will never be forgotten. Prayers for his family.
ReplyI was so saddened to hear this. I always talked to my sons about him…his Catholic Faith, his incredible teaching ability in math, and his long distance running. I made sure they each met him. He was so respected and admired, and so friendly. We have lost an exceptional man. Eternal Rest grant unto him, O LORD, and may Perpetual Light shine upon him. Rest In Peace.
ReplyI am so sorry to hear of Jim’s passing. He touched so many lives, in so many ways. Mine wasn’t in math but on the roads. We ran a lot of miles together. I have thought of him often over the years and when I did, I would smile. How could anyone love those 5 – mile time trials!?! He definitely was a positive influence in my life. Praying for the Derwort family.
ReplyI couldn’t have asked for a better man to start my teaching career with. He was a great role model for anyone getting into teaching. I truly enjoyed teaching, coaching, and golfing with him. May he rest in peace.
ReplyI never had a better friend. We had so many good times together. My condolences to Sue, Mark, and Jackie.
ReplyMy prayers and thoughts are with your family!
He was an amazing math teacher that truly cared about all his kids! He made math so much fun! He will truly be missed
Mrs. Derwort, Marc, Jackie, and family, my prayers are with you all of you. Mr. Derwort was one of the greats. The kind of person that makes a lasting impact on everyone who crosses his path. He never let me get down on myself when calculus or trig seemed impossible and believed in his students even when they didn’t in themselves. His warm smile was always there in the classroom and the hallway. He embodied all the exceptional qualities of an educator and mentor and the community of Marissa was so blessed by him. May the wonderful memories live on in your hearts until you all meet again.
ReplyThoughts and prayers for all who knew Jim. He touched many lives. While it will be an adjustment for those who loved him take comfort knowing you will c him again one day. My sis has a saying I love. “My last breath on earth is my first breath in heaven”
ReplyHe was my teacher, coach, and friend. No one has ever touched my life as he did! Rest in Heaven, knowing you did Gods work here. You finished the race. You kept the Faith. Rest In Peace.
ReplyDear Sue, you have lost your mate of many years, and the world has lost a great person. Jim was a wonderful individual and an incredible teacher, as he made math fun for his students. He loved running and enjoyed sports and 50s and 60s music so much. We had many interesting conversations throughout the years. He is a loss to many as he touched innumerable lives in his years on earth.
ReplyJim, my fraternity brother, and I go back to 1966. It is extremely difficult to put into so few words all we had experienced in those 55 years. He was a wonderful man, husband, father and friend and we all loved him. Rest in peace, brother. I’ll see you down the road…..
ReplySue, Marc, and Jackie,
Jim was a great role model, friend, and colleague. He is the reason I ended up teaching at Marissa. I loved working beside and with him. I’ve often said that teaching has never been the same since he retired. He was so much fun to work with. God places people in your life for a reason and I know both Jim and Sue were instrumental in our first years of marriage as neighbors, teaching, and lives. He was so committed to God’s work at school through FCA and will be missed greatly!
We fondly remember the time spent with the Derworts during Mark’s time at Gibault. Wonderful family? Our condolences to Sue, Mark, and Jackie.
ReplySue, our prayers are with you ❤️
My children thought the world
of Jim. Especially Max.
May he see all the lives he touched and how much he is loved and will be missed.
Luv you Sue🇺🇸🇺🇸
Gary & Kay miller & family
Truly a wonderful man. So sorry for your loss.
ReplyMr. Derwort was such an amazing man. Praying that God grants your family strength during this difficult time and that His comfort and peace surround you.
ReplyJim was an exceptional teacher, both in the classroom and by the way he lived his life. Strong religious beliefs, a kind and generously personality, coupled with a mischievous sense of humor made him a man who was admired and loved by many. He was special; he will be missed. Rest with Jesus Jim, for you have earned your heavenly reward.
Sue, Marc and Jackie, may your memories sustain you and bring you comfort and peace.
ReplySo sorry for your loss Sue. Prayers for comfort and strength during this difficult time for you and your family.
ReplyI will never forget Mr. Derwort’s humor, toughness and caring to make others better. I was always amazed by his memory of 50’s and 60’s music and how he loved playing name that tune while driving to and from basketball practice. He was a wonderful person who touched many lives. My condolences to Sue, Marc and Jackie.
ReplyI was so saddened to hear of Mr. Derwort’s passing. He was a great person. Nice,funny, smart. He would go above and beyond for his students. So sorry for your loss. May God be with you all.
ReplyWait up Jim! Let me tie my running shoes!
Can’t remember a single time that I was with Jim that he wasn’t engaging, intelligent and funny. He loved his sports and his classic rock and roll music. Among many other things we shared many a love of math. Both my kids loved having him as a teacher; as for Nicole’s part of that, that’s saying something because she hated math!!!
His memory will bring a smile and warmth to all of us who knew him.
Sue, Jackie and Marc, I know the last few years were tough. Without exception, when the subject came up everyone’s heart was with you all. May you all find peace and comfort in this time of loss.
ReplyJim touched so many hearts and lives! He was my first friend and mentor at Marissa Jr/Sr High School and he was such a wonderful human being! A constant source of kindness and positivity. Much love to his family.
ReplyJim was a joy to know. A friend to everyone who knew him. If I would have had a brother I’d want him to be like Jim.
ReplySue and family, my heart was broken when I heard the news of Jim. I came to Marissa as the new principal and knew no one. Jim immediately became my friend and colleague as the days grew to years. His laughter always brought me joy to a rather stressful job. We spent many days talking about education and his love of teaching. Even on the golf course we still talked and laughed about work and the students we came across each day. We grew closer as friends and began to share our love of the Lord as well as our families. He was always steadfast in putting the Lord first, then family and friends. I will miss our talks, his laughter, our golf games, his sneaking up on me in front of my garage and our monthly meetings in Highland. He was a good friend that I will never forget. Rest In Peace my friend until we meet again.
ReplyMy heartfelt condolences to you I’ll always remember Jim as the stalwart mentor who ran with and counseled my Tom as he searched for meaning in his teen years, The friendship Jim provided was so apparent and I never really thanked Jim. Sue, you and Jim were also instrumental in welcoming me to Marissa after I married Hutie—-and I want you to know how much I appreciate that, too!, Please know that you all are in my prayers—-may God grant you peace and solace in the happy memories I’m sure you treasure
ReplyI was there when Jim ran a sub-three-hour marathon in St. Louis on a hilly course in 30-degree weather. I believe his final time was around 2:57! I never had a bad day around Jim Derwort. He embodied all of the best elements of a true friend: kindness, humor, and acceptance. Without being aware of it, Jim taught me the keys to living in faith. I want to publicly thank Sue, Marc, and Jackie for sharing Jim with me for so much time. He nurtured my love for running when it was at its lowest ebb, and to be honest probably helped guide my philosophy as a sports medicine doctor. And now, I harken back to seeing Jim with his own kids and use some of his corny humor to entertain my grandsons! Thanks be to God for putting Jim Derwort in my life. May all of you who are grieving his loss take comfort in his final finish line.
ReplyI am sorry I cant be there I am stuck in an ambulance right now. Doris and Jim you two taught me many things and dealt with my great interest for Math. But you two taught much more and instilled many great values in my life to me. Mr. Derwort you have pushed me, intrigued me, showed me your great family and personal values that made a unmistakable HUGE impact on my life. Allowing me into your house and treating is as family. Your great family. Your kindness love and appreciation just some of your great qualities affected so many. I fortunately had time with you in sports, classes, practices, dances, FCA, sponsors, jogging, and so much more. Or just our talks many mornings of me trying to catch up on homework in the hallway from late game night. And yes it was always just coffee on my thermos. You knew how hard it was and always supported me.Thank you so much. You are legend. Heaven gained an angel.
ReplySue, Mark, and Jackie – I am so sorry for your loss. I have very good memories of visits with my Dad (John) in the summer when I was kid -shooting pool in your basement, playing basketball outside with Jim and Mark, listening to stories about the Derwort boys growing up, and even going into St. Louis. My thoughts are with you – Jeff Derwort
ReplyJackie,
I am saddened to learn of your dad’s passing. I am not in contact with anyone from Marissa, so, a few weeks have gone by. I know he was loved by so many students. I remember him as being an upbeat guy who enjoyed a laugh and some good old time rock and roll. Tell your mom I am sorry for her loss. May God rest his soul.
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Jackie,
I am saddened to learn of your dad’s passing. I am not in contact with anyone from Marissa, so, a few weeks have gone by. I know he was loved by so many students. I remember him as being an upbeat guy who enjoyed a laugh and some good old time rock and roll. Tell your mom I am sorry for her loss. May God rest his soul.
Sue, Mark, and Jackie – I am so sorry for your loss. I have very good memories of visits with my Dad (John) in the summer when I was kid -shooting pool in your basement, playing basketball outside with Jim and Mark, listening to stories about the Derwort boys growing up, and even going into St. Louis. My thoughts are with you – Jeff Derwort
I am sorry I cant be there I am stuck in an ambulance right now. Doris and Jim you two taught me many things and dealt with my great interest for Math. But you two taught much more and instilled many great values in my life to me. Mr. Derwort you have pushed me, intrigued me, showed me your great family and personal values that made a unmistakable HUGE impact on my life. Allowing me into your house and treating is as family. Your great family. Your kindness love and appreciation just some of your great qualities affected so many. I fortunately had time with you in sports, classes, practices, dances, FCA, sponsors, jogging, and so much more. Or just our talks many mornings of me trying to catch up on homework in the hallway from late game night. And yes it was always just coffee on my thermos. You knew how hard it was and always supported me.Thank you so much. You are legend. Heaven gained an angel.
I was there when Jim ran a sub-three-hour marathon in St. Louis on a hilly course in 30-degree weather. I believe his final time was around 2:57! I never had a bad day around Jim Derwort. He embodied all of the best elements of a true friend: kindness, humor, and acceptance. Without being aware of it, Jim taught me the keys to living in faith. I want to publicly thank Sue, Marc, and Jackie for sharing Jim with me for so much time. He nurtured my love for running when it was at its lowest ebb, and to be honest probably helped guide my philosophy as a sports medicine doctor. And now, I harken back to seeing Jim with his own kids and use some of his corny humor to entertain my grandsons! Thanks be to God for putting Jim Derwort in my life. May all of you who are grieving his loss take comfort in his final finish line.
My heartfelt condolences to you I’ll always remember Jim as the stalwart mentor who ran with and counseled my Tom as he searched for meaning in his teen years, The friendship Jim provided was so apparent and I never really thanked Jim. Sue, you and Jim were also instrumental in welcoming me to Marissa after I married Hutie—-and I want you to know how much I appreciate that, too!, Please know that you all are in my prayers—-may God grant you peace and solace in the happy memories I’m sure you treasure
Sue and family, my heart was broken when I heard the news of Jim. I came to Marissa as the new principal and knew no one. Jim immediately became my friend and colleague as the days grew to years. His laughter always brought me joy to a rather stressful job. We spent many days talking about education and his love of teaching. Even on the golf course we still talked and laughed about work and the students we came across each day. We grew closer as friends and began to share our love of the Lord as well as our families. He was always steadfast in putting the Lord first, then family and friends. I will miss our talks, his laughter, our golf games, his sneaking up on me in front of my garage and our monthly meetings in Highland. He was a good friend that I will never forget. Rest In Peace my friend until we meet again.
Jim was a joy to know. A friend to everyone who knew him. If I would have had a brother I’d want him to be like Jim.
Jim touched so many hearts and lives! He was my first friend and mentor at Marissa Jr/Sr High School and he was such a wonderful human being! A constant source of kindness and positivity. Much love to his family.
Wait up Jim! Let me tie my running shoes!
Can’t remember a single time that I was with Jim that he wasn’t engaging, intelligent and funny. He loved his sports and his classic rock and roll music. Among many other things we shared many a love of math. Both my kids loved having him as a teacher; as for Nicole’s part of that, that’s saying something because she hated math!!!
His memory will bring a smile and warmth to all of us who knew him.
Sue, Jackie and Marc, I know the last few years were tough. Without exception, when the subject came up everyone’s heart was with you all. May you all find peace and comfort in this time of loss.
I was so saddened to hear of Mr. Derwort’s passing. He was a great person. Nice,funny, smart. He would go above and beyond for his students. So sorry for your loss. May God be with you all.
I will never forget Mr. Derwort’s humor, toughness and caring to make others better. I was always amazed by his memory of 50’s and 60’s music and how he loved playing name that tune while driving to and from basketball practice. He was a wonderful person who touched many lives. My condolences to Sue, Marc and Jackie.
So sorry for your loss Sue. Prayers for comfort and strength during this difficult time for you and your family.
Jim was an exceptional teacher, both in the classroom and by the way he lived his life. Strong religious beliefs, a kind and generously personality, coupled with a mischievous sense of humor made him a man who was admired and loved by many. He was special; he will be missed. Rest with Jesus Jim, for you have earned your heavenly reward.
Sue, Marc and Jackie, may your memories sustain you and bring you comfort and peace.
Mr. Derwort was such an amazing man. Praying that God grants your family strength during this difficult time and that His comfort and peace surround you.
Truly a wonderful man. So sorry for your loss.
Sue, our prayers are with you ❤️
My children thought the world
of Jim. Especially Max.
May he see all the lives he touched and how much he is loved and will be missed.
Luv you Sue🇺🇸🇺🇸
Gary & Kay miller & family
We fondly remember the time spent with the Derworts during Mark’s time at Gibault. Wonderful family? Our condolences to Sue, Mark, and Jackie.
Sue, Marc, and Jackie,
Jim was a great role model, friend, and colleague. He is the reason I ended up teaching at Marissa. I loved working beside and with him. I’ve often said that teaching has never been the same since he retired. He was so much fun to work with. God places people in your life for a reason and I know both Jim and Sue were instrumental in our first years of marriage as neighbors, teaching, and lives. He was so committed to God’s work at school through FCA and will be missed greatly!
Jim, my fraternity brother, and I go back to 1966. It is extremely difficult to put into so few words all we had experienced in those 55 years. He was a wonderful man, husband, father and friend and we all loved him. Rest in peace, brother. I’ll see you down the road…..
Dear Sue, you have lost your mate of many years, and the world has lost a great person. Jim was a wonderful individual and an incredible teacher, as he made math fun for his students. He loved running and enjoyed sports and 50s and 60s music so much. We had many interesting conversations throughout the years. He is a loss to many as he touched innumerable lives in his years on earth.
He was my teacher, coach, and friend. No one has ever touched my life as he did! Rest in Heaven, knowing you did Gods work here. You finished the race. You kept the Faith. Rest In Peace.
Thoughts and prayers for all who knew Jim. He touched many lives. While it will be an adjustment for those who loved him take comfort knowing you will c him again one day. My sis has a saying I love. “My last breath on earth is my first breath in heaven”
Mrs. Derwort, Marc, Jackie, and family, my prayers are with you all of you. Mr. Derwort was one of the greats. The kind of person that makes a lasting impact on everyone who crosses his path. He never let me get down on myself when calculus or trig seemed impossible and believed in his students even when they didn’t in themselves. His warm smile was always there in the classroom and the hallway. He embodied all the exceptional qualities of an educator and mentor and the community of Marissa was so blessed by him. May the wonderful memories live on in your hearts until you all meet again.
My prayers and thoughts are with your family!
He was an amazing math teacher that truly cared about all his kids! He made math so much fun! He will truly be missed
I never had a better friend. We had so many good times together. My condolences to Sue, Mark, and Jackie.
I couldn’t have asked for a better man to start my teaching career with. He was a great role model for anyone getting into teaching. I truly enjoyed teaching, coaching, and golfing with him. May he rest in peace.
I am so sorry to hear of Jim’s passing. He touched so many lives, in so many ways. Mine wasn’t in math but on the roads. We ran a lot of miles together. I have thought of him often over the years and when I did, I would smile. How could anyone love those 5 – mile time trials!?! He definitely was a positive influence in my life. Praying for the Derwort family.
I was so saddened to hear this. I always talked to my sons about him…his Catholic Faith, his incredible teaching ability in math, and his long distance running. I made sure they each met him. He was so respected and admired, and so friendly. We have lost an exceptional man. Eternal Rest grant unto him, O LORD, and may Perpetual Light shine upon him. Rest In Peace.
So sorry to hear of his passing. He was an exceptional person and teacher. He was one of my favorite teachers at Marissa. He gave more of his time than most to his students and we appreciated it. Always looked for to seeing the color combination of his outfits since he said he was color blind. RIP Mr. Derwort you were one of a kind and will never be forgotten. Prayers for his family.
Mr. Derwort touched so many lives. Truly a wonderful person and the best teacher I’ve ever had. So sorry to all of his family.
I was very sad to hear that Jim had passed. We were a math teaching team for 17 years. He was an awesome teacher and truly one of the nicest people that I have ever met. The whole family was so nice. My prayers and thoughts are with his family during this difficult time. I am remembering his smile and some of the pranks that we pulled off. He always was willing to give of his time to help others. What a wonderful legacy he has left! I am glad that I knew Jim and his family.
Mr Derwort was an exceptional teacher and person. Thinking of the family.
Sincerely,
Connie Crouse Sommer
Mr Derwort, an Icon to Marissa school district. Such a Blessing to ALL that knew him. I have unmeasurable respect, love and admiration for him and his wonderful wife Sue. He is running with Jesus and telling jokes to all the Angels. ❤️😇✝️
My deepest condolences to Sue and his family!
I am so sorry to hear this news. My prayers and condolences go out to Sue, Jackie and Marc and their families. I’ll never forget when Mr Derwort had my trigonometry class over to his house one evening to tutor us on formulas. What an amazing teacher who touched the hearts of many. He was also a great athlete and never missed a run. Take comfort in knowing he is whole again and running a marathon in heaven. ❤️
Rest in peace Jim.
RIP Mr Derwort. You made learning Math fun. Never had another teacher like you and wish my son had an educator that cared as much as you did. Condolences to the family.
Sue, Marc, Jackie, and the rest of your family…I’m so sorry for your loss. He was the best teacher I have ever had and best colleague as well. Our school and our community were, and are, better places because of him. He was a great man, a selfless man, and I am honored to have known him. He is the main reason I got into teaching and will be forever grateful to him!!
In am very sad to hear this ,what a great person he was and an outstanding teacher as well…My condolences and thoughts and prayers to his family..Godspeed Mr. D.. you will be missed by many,but never forgotten
Mr. Derwart was such a wonderful person. I know he will be missed by many. Our prayers are going out to his family.
Mr. Derwort, thank you for the great times of learning math and your support when the school board said no. To the times we shared talking about aircraft model kits. Your F-89 awaits you.
God Speed
Thoughts and prayers to the family. Mr. Derwort was one of the best teachers and just a kind and fun person to be around. He made school and math fun!
So sorry to hear this! I worked with Jim at the high school for seven years. Sending prayers to all.
The term “school teacher” hardly describes Mr Derwort’s occupation adequately as he was so much more to his decades of students whose lives he impacted. Math and sports were great passions as well as his passion for the Lord and his family. I am privileged to have been one of those students and considered him and Sue dear friends who I enjoyed visiting every time I came to town. Years ago, I was honored when they asked me to babysit their son Marc, a toddler at that time.
My prayers are uplifted with love for Sue, Marc, Jackie, their spouse and children.
Condolences to the family! One of the great teachers that I had in high school. God bless the family
Sue and family – Jim was a blessing! Such a fun guy and wonderful educator – he touched so many lives. Alzheimers is cruel – when my mom died all of us girls got tattoos, mine says “Your memories are kept in my heart.” May the memories of your loved one sustain you as you hold them in you heart.
Connie Calvert Cominsky
My heart hurts at hearing of the death of Mr Derwort. He was the kindest, sweetest best teacher and person I’ve met. His family is the best as well. He is most definitely already safely in the arms of our Lord in Heaven. May all of your wonderful memories sustain you in your times of loss and need. My thoughts and prayers are with you all; Sue, Mark and Jackie. All my love, Pamela Sinn Hargan